kruizing with kikukat

Monday, September 10, 2012

Insanity: Kikukat's Monster Cookies

Last week was an INSANE week.  Being a 4-day work week meant that all the crazy nuttiness was crammed into 4 days, rather than stretched out over 5 days.  My job doesn't pay enough for all the abuse I take!

I'm grateful to have survived the work craziness.  I took part in a 2-day draining (I was one of the drainers), and there were times when I thought the SSCs were gonna riot.  I don't envy the task ahead of them, and if they are not strong writers, they will be up shit creek when its time for them to write the reports, which cannot be "cut and pasted" anymore.  This is gonna majorly jam some people up.  But I don't make up these rules.

Speaking of insane, I recently decided to bake a batch of cookies using a recipe I first tried 2 1/2 decades ago.  I think the recipe is insane because the ingredient amounts are copious.  Even the recipe yield is hilarious:  "makes enough to feed an army".  And if you are a baker, you'll notice that flour isn't in the ingredient list!  When you get to the recipe below, you'll definitely see the insanity.

I first made monster cookies when I came home on a break from college.  I'm not sure where I found the recipe, but being clueless (even though I thought I knew everything), I went ahead and made a batch.  Yes, I used the dozen eggs and 18 cups of oatmeal.  Needless to say my family had monster cookies coming out of our ears.  In order to stem my parents' growing concern that they'd be eating monster cookies for the remainder of summer, I gave bags away to my friends who were here.
A was given a bag, and right away, she called me for the recipe.  Her mama, a home economics teacher, wanted the recipe.

Fast forward ten years or so...A gives me a cookbook...its a 50th anniversary cookbook of the institute of higher education which gives A a paycheck.  I attended for 3 semesters, so I guess its sort of my school too.  Anyway, she submitted my recipe, the full version with the 18 glorious cups of oatmeal!  Way to go, A!!!

Being older and wiser, I was smart enough to make a quarter batch this time.  I've listed both recipes.  One for the shock value (the original that I made back in the late 80s) and the one I made when wisdom kicked in.


click on recipe title for printable recipe

     2 c butter
     3 lbs creamy peanut butter
     12 eggs
     8 tsp baking soda
     1 lb M & Ms (plain)
     2 lbs brown sugar
     4 c sugar
     1 tbsp light corn syrup
     1 lb chocolate chips
     18 c quick cooking oatmeal


     1/2 c butter
     3/4 lb peanut butter
     3 eggs
     2 tsp baking soda
     1/4 lb M & Ms (plain)
     1/2 lb brown sugar
     1 c sugar
     3/4 tsp light corn syrup
     1/4 lb chocolate chips
     4 1/2 c quick cooking oatmeal

The procedure is the same for both:  Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Grease several baking sheets.  Cream butter, peanut butter, and sugars.  Add eggs and corn syrup.  Quickly add baking soda, M & Ms, chocolate chips, and oatmeal.  Mix well.  Plop large scoops on prepared baking sheets.  Flatten.  Bake for 12-20 minutes, depending on the kind of baking sheets you use and how crunchy you like your cookie.  I like my cookies crunchy so I bake them for the full 20 minutes on airbake sheets.


And for the record, mom DID flip out when she saw the original recipe (yep, the version with the dozen eggs).  I wasn't working then, so she is the one who had to pay for all the ingredients!



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