Ohelo Berry Cream Cheese Pie

What a week I had!  I ended up in bed Monday afternoon and evening due to a bout of food poisoning.  I'm certain I got it from the Krispy Kreme donuts Mr. Dependable brought back from Maui.  I don't think he poisoned them on purpose, but it was my second experience with food poisoning from Krispy Kreme donuts.  My favorite Krispy Kreme is the chocolate (no hole) with creme filling.  I had one on Sunday evening and another for breakfast on Monday.  By noon on  Monday. I was praying to the porcelain god. . .sick, sick, sick.  I couldn't eat dinner.

By Tuesday morning, I was much better, but going to Asami's to buy lunch for D2 was totally unpleasant.  The food aroma was excruciating.  I think the cause of my troubles was the staphylococci bacteria.  It was horrible, and it wasn't until the end of the weekend that I could even think about eating normally again.  I don't want to see another Krispy Kreme for a while.

Sometime in the middle of my recovery, it turned into July.  This means that my summer is over halfway done.  That sucks.  In just a few weeks, I'll be back at my regular job.  Hmmmm. . .maybe that doesn't sound so bad.  I've been working all summer, and my summer job is actually more intense than my regular job!

July also means that it's ohelo berry time!  I wonder if I will be able to make it up to the mountain to pick a quart.  Probably not this year.  This past weekend would've been a good time to go, but I didn't wanna chance walking in a rocky area with my ankle not yet fully healed.  I forgot to mention that I twisted my ankle when we had the earthquake last week.  My foot had fallen asleep, but the earthquake scared me so much that I jumped out of my chair, forgetting that my foot was numb.  I didn't step properly and I stumbled around before being able to regain my balance.  It still hurts when I bend and rotate it.  Ohelo tends to grow in rocky terrain so there's no way to avoid walking on rocks.  Luckily, ohelo berries freeze well, so at least I'll get to have my annual ohelo berry dessert since my tummy is better now.

When I worked for a government office, one of my former coworkers would recount tales of an annual trek to Hilo just to pick ohelo berries at a "secret family spot".  She made some kind of cream cheese pie with the berries and served it at a luncheon hosting new teachers.  While I was ecstatic at being reacquainted with ohelo, I wasn't liking the pie much...the topping was hopelessly runny and fell off the pieces when she cut them.  The runny topping also diluted the cream cheese layer.  Auwe!

About a year ago, I posted a recipe for Ohelo Berry Bars.   Those are good to make if you don't have the refrigerator real estate to hold an oblong pan.  If you have space in your refrigerator, then this is THE ohelo berry dessert to prepare.  Ohelo Berry Cream Cheese Pie, at least this version, will not disappoint.

Ohelo Berry Cream Cheese Pie

Crust:  2 c flour
            2 tbsp sugar
            1 c butter

Filling:  8 oz cream cheese, softened
              1 c sugar
              8 oz Cool Whip

Topping:  4 c ohelo berries
                1 c sugar
                1/4 tsp lemon juice
                pinch of salt
                1 tsp gelatin, optional
                4 tbsp cornstarch
                2 tbsp water

Combine flour and sugar for crust.  Cut in butter.  Press into 9 x 13" pan.  Bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes.  Cool completely before adding filling.  While crust is baking, make topping.  Combine ohelo berries, sugar, lemon juice, salt, and gelatin in a saucepan.  Bring to a boil.  Cook for 10 minutes.  Combine cornstarch with water.  While stirring berry mixture, add cornstarch and water.  Bring to a boil.  Remove from heat and cool completely.  Beat cream cheese with sugar for filling.  Mix in Cool Whip until well combined.  Spread evenly over cooled crust.  Keep chilled until topping is cool.  When topping is cool, spread evenly over filling.  Chill at least 2 hours before cutting into squares to serve.

Last month, Mr. Dependable went to the mainland with AC.  They visited Las Vegas and Oregon, the zenith of their trip being T's graduation from THAT school.  Since the Ds were left with the task of feeding, watering, and caring for his pets, I asked him to bring us back some Trader Joe's cookie butter.  In addition to my request, he also gave me 2 chocolate bars.  One said "Thank You", and the other, well. . .let's just say it had profanity on it (look at the gold foil-wrapped bar).

Mr Dependable must be on a generosity streak.  On Friday, before taking the Ds on a mini vacay, he brought over a box of apple bananas and 2 more of those nasty chocolate bars.  Talk about adding insult to injury (my ankle and tummy)!

I agree that the sentiment of bringing back omiyage from traveling is a generous gesture, and sharing the bounty of your harvest is also very generous, HOWEVER, the candy bars celebrate the team in the entire NCAA I loathe most.  

Once my tummy is totally better, I will be disposing of those darn chocolate bars in an utterly undignified manner. . .I will gnaw on them with my canine teeth!

I will NEVER EVER cheer for the ducks. 

Go DAWGS!

Food Processor Dessert: Lemon Bars

Happy New Year!!!  I'm back at work today, but students don't return until Wednesday.  I'm not excited about having to work, but I am excited about beginning the second half of the school year.  In 5 months, the bleeding will end (and new gaping wounds will open).

Before I continue, I'd like to wish a belated happy birthday to my friend Maggie in NY.  Would've loved to join in the celebration at the Cheesecake Factory and check out the 80s band.

I'm feeling rather well-rested, having dodged the bullet of hosting an endless new year gathering.  All I was asked to bring was some kind of namasu and a dessert to CAE's house.  The namasu was easy. . .cucumber & chicken namasu.  The dessert was a no-brainer. . .lemon cake, fruit cake, and confetti jello.  I was going to make lemon bars, my "signature" dessert, but I made lemonade with the last of the lemon juice.  My favorite uncle has a huge dose of a citrus beverage daily to combat the formation of kidney stones.  And really, I think I OD'd on lemon bars anyway.

I've been making lemon bars for nearly two decades, and for most of that time, my lemon bars were just another item on the dessert table.  My late uncle would ask me to bring it as a dessert to family parties.  But a year or two ago, things changed.  After bringing the bars to an office potluck, my buddy SF asked me to make some for the dessert table for her daughter's wedding.  I once made a 40-piece tray of it for a "feed-the-hungry" service project for D1 (she got yelled at by her club advisor---"thats not the kind of dessert for a soup kitchen!").  This past summer, I brought it to a gathering at the HHS pool when the students from Sumoto came for a visit.  The club advisor and some of the kids went crazy.  D1 said that she saw a student eat 5.  That was the first time D1 and D2 had ever eaten lemon bars (yup, I know what you're thinking).  D1 wanted to know what all the fuss was about, and D2 decided to get in on some of the action too.  Since this school year began in August, D1 has come home and told me on more than one occasion:  "___ asked if you could make lemon bars" and "I want to give lemon bars to ___".

About a month ago, one of my bosses told me, "My mom said you're known for your lemon bars."  This was after he thanked me for the tray of lemon bars I brought to the office and the separate tray D1 gave his wife.  That same boss called me during the vacation and asked me for the recipe (claims his wife lost the paper copy I gave).  Of course I obliged. . .I like the guy!  D1's friend brought me a plastic bag filled with lemons from her tree so "you can make lemon bars or something".  Unbeknownst to me, she told her club advisor "D1's mom makes the best lemon bars."  This resulted in the club advisor asking me if he could independently verify this claim.  All this lemon attention just has me laughing.

And I don't mind.  I have the recipe memorized.  I have multiple pans (exactly the same) which allow me to make several pans at a time (no point in making just 1 pan).  Experience has taught me a lot about making and serving lemon bars. 

Kitchen mess is a huge issue for me.  I hate to look at a pile of dirty dishes.  It pisses me off and irritates me when dishes sit unwashed, and that is why I use the food processor to make lemon bars.  The crust and filling can be mixed in the food processor bowl, and the washing is done when the filling is made...no need to wash and dry the bowl between crust and filling.   And if you line the baking pans with foil, the pans will stay clean.  Another huge plus to lining the pan with foil---you will have a nice apron when you dust the bars with powdered sugar.

If I make lemon bars for myself, my preferred shape is the "finger", where the pan is cut into 3 long pieces, then each piece is cut into 10-12 pieces.  But if I am making the bars for an event or to give away, I will cut them into squares.  A 9 x 13-inch pan will yield 35 (5 x 7) squares which are perfect for the medium size baking cups.

I am now staring down the barrel at the 2nd half of the school year.  Over vacation, it occurred to me that perhaps I'm often asked to make lemon bars because people think that's the only thing I can make!  I may need to think of a game changer soon.

click on recipe title for printable recipe

Lemon Bars

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Crust:  2 c flour
            2 tbsp sugar
            2 tbsp powdered sugar
            3/4 c butter

Combine all ingredients in a food processor until tiny crumbs form.  Press into a 9 x 13" pan.  Bake for 15 minutes.  Make filling while crust is baking.

Filling:  2 c sugar
              1/2 c flour
              1/4 tsp salt
              1/4 tsp vanilla
              1 tsp baking powder
              4 eggs
              5 tbsp lemon juice (may use up to 8 tbsp if you like it tart; adjust baking time accordingly)

Combine all filling ingredients in the same food processor bowl used for crust.  Process until smooth.  Pour over hot crust and bake 25 minutes.  Cool completely.  Dust with powdered sugar.  Cut into desired pieces.

One pan will make 35 squares or 30-36 "fingers".

Congratulations to LA & SN, who announced their engagement to the family on Monday evening.  We will definitely "save the date" (and buy SN a new shirt. . .gotta admit, the boy would look much better in purple & gold).  WOOF!!!

ten.twelve.fourteen

I overcame my frustration with knitting and have been going great guns.  I joined Ravelry and now have access to all sorts of patterns.  I am most delighted with the Noro Silk Garden Darkside Cowl and Beanie.  I started the cowl 3 times (dropped stitches).  The beanie was less annoying, although it is slightly too large for me.  I'm thinking this set will make a nice gift for someone.

Inspired by the Noro Silk Garden Beanie (and dissatisfied with a simple chunky hat pattern I'd been using), I developed my own beanie pattern to use with some chunky yarns, Feza Bogeta and Plymout Yarns Grandiosa.  I love the way the Feza Bogeta yarn worked out, but I'm sure the more economical Lion Brand yarns would work fine too.  Wal-Mart has them in all sorts of colors.  Click here for the printable beanie pattern, which is also available in free .pdf on the Ravelry site.

Note:  These are actually human hats, but I couldn't find a willing model.  Panda and Fat Dawggie had to sign a model release!

Panda in Feza Bogeta beanie

Fat Dawggie in Plymouth Grandiosa beanie